The Only

Posted: Saturday, October 26, 2019 by Stained in Labels:

Talkin' to voices in my head
Because at least they're listening
Right here's an easy place to hide 
I'll stay in bed and shut the blinds

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You were good to me

Posted: Wednesday, July 10, 2019 by Stained in Labels:

And I'm so used to letting go 
But I don't wanna be alone 
You were good to me 
You were good to me, yeah, oh

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ILLENIUM, Jon Bellion - Good Things Fall Apart

Posted: Tuesday, June 18, 2019 by Stained in Labels:

That night when we fogged up the windows in your best friends car, 
Cause we couldn’t leave the windows down in december

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EDEN - drugs

Posted: Sunday, March 17, 2019 by Stained in Labels:

Till my chest is on fire
And my head just won't die
I guess I'm lying cause I wanna
I guess I'm lying cause I don't
Cause I just feel so tired
Like it's move or slowly die
You ain't you when you're like this
This ain't you and you know it
But ain't that just the point?
You don't know How to let go
Who said this must be all or nothing?
But I'm still caught below
And I'll never let you know
No I can't tell you nothing

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Tera Woh Pyar (Nawazishein Karam)

Posted: Thursday, January 03, 2019 by Stained in Labels:

Raat andheri mein chhup rahe the 
Gum ek sawera dhoond rahe the 
Sadiyon se jaise jaag rahe the 
Pyar ko apne dhaanp rahe the

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There's No Way

Posted: Saturday, November 24, 2018 by Stained in Labels:

I wish I could make the time stop
So we could forget everything and everyone
I wish that the time would line up
So we could just give in to what we want

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Posted: Monday, October 15, 2018 by Stained in Labels:

you know that I've been here times before 
and no one's watching 
you won't ever know, that's right 
you won't ever change my life 
you won't ever change my mind

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It isn't in my blood

Posted: Friday, April 06, 2018 by Stained in Labels:

Help me, it's like the walls are caving in 
Sometimes I feel like giving up 
No medicine is strong enough 
Someone help me I'm crawling in my skin 
Sometimes I feel like giving up 
But I just can't 
It isn't in my blood 

It isn't in my blood

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These days

Posted: Sunday, February 25, 2018 by Stained in Labels:

I don't bother writing my poetry down so it gets lost as my memory gets distracted with life. So I'm using words written by others.

Three years of ups and downs
Nothing to show for it now
And I know it ain't pretty when the fire burns out
Calling me when I'm drunk, remind me of what I've done
And I know it ain't pretty when you're trying to move on, yeah

I hope someday
We'll sit down together
And laugh with each other
About these days, these days
All our troubles
We'll lay to rest
And we'll wish we could come back to these days, these days

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Ed Sheeran - Happier

Posted: Sunday, March 12, 2017 by Stained in Labels:

Ain't nobody hurt you like I hurt you
But ain't nobody need you like I do
I know that there's others that deserve you
But my darling I am still in love with you

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No Good

Posted: Sunday, January 22, 2017 by Stained in Labels: ,

It's nice to see the band Kaleo get the exposure they've been getting lately for their song "Way down we go" especially through the "Logan" trailer. I discovered them last year and got instantly hooked to their music. "No Good" is by a long shot my favorite song of theirs.

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Day Dream

Posted: Monday, December 19, 2016 by Stained in Labels:


Draped in red
Amongst the crowd
Enveloped in love
An enduring limelight

Forever elevated
A burden exonerated
Mint snuffles
Floral daydreams

A conclusion long owed
Wrecked morose eyes
Unsteady arms
Remorseful pleasures

Those eyes
Hard to believe
Lost a heartbeat
An enduring daydream

- Stained

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On my way to find you

Posted: Sunday, December 11, 2016 by Stained in Labels:

So bring the lightning, bring the fire, bring the fall
I know I'll get my heart through
I was on my way to find you
Got miles to go, but from the day I started crawling
I was on my way to find you

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Right now

Posted: Saturday, October 15, 2016 by Stained in Labels:

The doctors believe that she's dying but we (and her therapist) see minor improvements. So the next time when we say she's doing okay... this is what we really mean.

I've been off social media (and the internet to a certain extend) for over 4 months now Was supposed to post the above across social media and then get back to being active but no such post has materialized cause the internet is full of self obsessed freaks and I just feel so alienated from it all. I guess the bright side is my online life mirrors my offline life...

Right now isn't looking too bright
Right now is where I don't want to be
Right now is coming to an end
Right now is the only place I belong

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Changing times

Posted: Thursday, August 25, 2016 by Stained in Labels:

I recently got hired to photograph a previous gen Ford Mustang. My point of contact was in adulation of my photography style and kept raving about the pictures I had online. I was visibly confused since I barely had any of my latest work online. So I queried about the work he liked and he spoke about the pictures I'd taken around 6 years ago.

Over time I've matured into a photographer who depends less on Lightroom automated editing actions. Gone are the days of sephia toning and over the top post processing. I try to keep it as artless and reliable as possible cause it makes my work flow less muddled.

Thanks to this shoot, I had to retreat to those older times. I managed to navigate clear of the automation but sephia toning did rear its vintage obnoxious head. The pictures turned out as good as this summer weather would permit and the client seemed relatively content with my sweats. Did I personally enjoy it? Oddly yes. I had fun looking over my older work and revisit some of those old techniques. It felt audacious. Makes you recognize how mundane life is if such trivial thing thrills you.

That bokeh thou....

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Somewhere Only We Know

Posted: Sunday, August 07, 2016 by Stained in Labels:

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

Tired of being visible among strangers so I guess I'd kick some dust here and be a stranger among strangers. Alive and kicking (and pulling a hamstring while at it)... toodles

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He’ll be alright

Posted: Tuesday, January 13, 2015 by Stained in Labels:


A little boy buried in shadows
Hissing to the world
Memories unheard of
Stories untying alone
Unbelievable or miraculous
What if he did something?
Something really bad
Spewed disgust

A sugary vengeance
It will break you they said
Outside the unrealities
Desolate or lucid
The prayer surely responded
Preserving the loved
Tickled disdain aligned
Embrace that breathe

That bundle of joy
Who would have guessed it?
Draped in bandages
Behind glass doors
A little girl sinking in air
Outside the unrealities
Between his fingers
He’ll be alright

- Stained

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The annoying human

Posted: Friday, May 16, 2014 by Stained in Labels:

Every time she hissed... Blood dripped from her mouth.
Her body was crushed & she was slowly letting go.
The human sat nearby helpless.

With rising hospital bills, I've reached at a point where every Dirham is precious. Every expense that can be eluded has been cut out of my life. No outings (not that I'm in a social mood lately), no petrol pump refreshment stops, no internet on the phone etc. I've even cut out on Salik which was something that never bothered me from the day of it's inception.

So I haven't picked up a dead cat off the road for a while. Reasons mainly being I haven't seen any that were on roads I could stop on or they already had their guts spilled all over so there wasn't much to save. Today on the way to Friday cricket (my daughters arrival has been delayed by more than a month so I'm enjoying the last few weeks of cricket left this summer) I took the longer route to avoid Salik. Two minutes from my destination I spotted a cat in the middle of the road. I quickly double parked on the side, wrapped a plastic bag around my hand like a glove and tried to pick up the dead cat. But it wasn't dead. As soon as I touched it, she lifted her head up and hissed at me. Broken rear legs and a back with blood wounds; and a blood laden mouth… she looked at me with disdain threatening to bite me if I touched her again. I stood there, in the middle of the road staring at her as she refused to let me pick her up. She’d turn her head quickly in my direction every time I moved and hiss at me as a drop of blood would fall from her mouth.

After a while a bunch of laborers passed by asking me if I’d hit it. I said no and told them I wanted to move it to the side. One of them got me a long pipe so that I could slowly nudge her. And nudge her I did. Every time the pipe touched her, she would hiss at me. She’d dig her front nails into the gravel, fighting my every nudge. But she was broken and was getting tired. The stupid human was annoying her and all she wanted was to sleep. After several nudges and a trail of blood, she was on the side of the road away from the traffic. A strong breeze blew by and as cats always do… she lifted her head, closed her eyes and enjoyed that cold breeze on her face. Then she laid her head down trying to fall asleep. But the human kept fidgeting in the spot he sat and that kept waking her up. A few more tired hisses and the human decided to leave her at peace.

I left her to suffer as she slowly let it go. Maybe the instant death another car would have given her might have been better. I do not know. I went back after the game of cricket. She was right where I’d left her though I think she’d tried to move as she was facing the other way. I picked her limp body up and laid her down in the sand nearby. The gleam in her eyes was still there and as filmy as it gets, I tried to close them. They wouldn't close and there was nothing more left for me to do....

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Cricket Hiatus

Posted: Sunday, April 20, 2014 by Stained in Labels:

I've been playing cricket for 20 years. The competitive desi inside me loves it. I am pretty decent at it as well (i.e. among friends). The last seven years or so I've been playing cricket almost every Friday with friends I met in college and their friends. We started keeping stats for the past three years and in the 130 or so matches we've played I've got the second highest batting average. Not bad honestly even though it's more due to my tendency to put a price tag on my wicket than sheer quantity of runs, but then among 20 or so players I am the fourth highest run maker. Bowling on the other side is a bit of a mixed bag where I get whacked more often than not due to my constant need of experimenting. But there are days when I'm completely unplayable especially when I'm landing those leg spins well. And then comes my knack of being a brilliant fielder with the highest number of catches and constant ability to save plenty of runs. I'm possibly the fastest across the ground with the second strongest throwing arm though overthrows have become a dark side I fall into often.

And then I broke a finger, and I've decided to take a hiatus. My daughter will Insha'Allah come to Dubai in about 30 days and I am going to be her primary caretaker. Constant monitoring will require me to stay healthy and injury free which I can't promise with cricket. It might be just a month or six or even forever. Doesn't matter because I'm done for now. It saddens me but some things just need to be done and this is one of those... (-_-)

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Posted: Friday, April 11, 2014 by Stained in Labels: ,


It revolves around a one
The spare of the first
Without it there is nothing
But this is the persistence
That was mistyped sideways
In invisible inked literacies
Of everything that it withheld
Concealed amongst bars
Smeared glossed layers
Flesh and carcasses
Tears and screams
Never break them they said
We cannot get out
This is the persistence
Going down the rabbit hole
Shoves and laps
Perspire and grime
A shadow waits in the gloom

- Stained

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