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Opinion required
Posted: Wednesday, December 09, 2009 by Stained inSo a friend of mine (lets call him Mu) asked my opinion regarding a situation he's in. I'm not sure how he ended up telling me this but now I literally know almost everything about his love life...weird. Anyway here's the situation....
Basically he's been going out with a girl (lets call her Ri) for over a year now but things haven't turned out the way he thought they would.
Initially when he had started liking Ri, he did a lot of things to impress her and after a long waiting period, she agreed to be with him. But things got complicated and she ended up being not the girl he had initially liked.
Then there is this other girl (lets call her Ta) who Mu used to like a lot ages ago but she had turned him down. Just recently he finds out that Ta has started liking him also and being the not so happy boyfriend he tends to get close to Ta and starts liking her all over again but Ta refuses to be with him due to various family issues.
So Mu wants to be with Ta who does not want to meet Mu again (she's scared she'll end up doing something stupid) while Ri has no idea all this has been happening...
He was curious to know what I thought about it and even though the right decision would be to stay with Ri and fix the issues instead of running behind Ta and possibility not getting anything in the end i.e losing both Ri and Ta, I told him to run behind Ta cause that's where he wants to be and that's what he should do......good advice or bad..?? any opinion welcome....
He needs to leave his gf first rather than doing all this behind her back. He's being a real asshole at the moment. If he's unhappy, tell her, not be a cheater, which btw is what he's doing in a way. Whether he's unhappy or not, she doesn't deserve this.
Run after the other chick if he wants but if he doesn't get anything, tell him not to be a jerk and go back to the gf...adding insult to injury there if he does that.
And losing both of them??? I mean, if he's unhappy, what is he afraid of losing? His unhappiness?
Better to make his gf unhappy now by telling her he's unhappy than her finding out he's two timing her. And how can he talk about being with someone else while IN a relationship???
Oh there's no right or wrong really; although yes it would be the honourable thing to do if he stayed in the relationship and gave it a chance first before mooning over someone else while still with Ri. Either way he's gotten himself into a right mess and someone is going to lose from this situation.
And thing I don't get, JUST bcoz Ta doesn't want to be with Mu, that's why he stayed with Ri??? I mean, from what you're saying, he sounds like he's bloody testing the grounds with Ta before deciding whether to leave Ri. Seriously? It's like, let me see if Ta wants me; if she doesn't, I'll stay with Ri. If she does, I'll leave my gf who has no idea wth I'm doing.
Classy.